If Books Could Thrill
Of truth, grandparents & the American Way.
As far as I know, my grandparents weren’t big readers. Oh sure, my maternal grandmother had her “stories” and my paternal grandfather pored over his accounting ledgers but I can’t recall books sitting on their nightstands. (I often rifled through their nightstands looking for $20 saving bonds. Score.)
But now apparently some enterprising elders have taken a big interest in books. Even bigger than pot roast night and Bing Crosby karaoke. A new progressive group called Grandparents for Truth (via the 19th) are taking on Moms for Liberty nationwide to fight book bans, right-wing school boards, and the impossibly small Garamond font type.
Personally I just assumed that all old people were Trumpers who only read books recommended by Tucker Carlson, meaning any book written by or about Tucker Carlson.
A quick refresher on Moms for Liberty. They’re a Florida-based group of concerned women who advocate for “parental rights” in schools and blah blah blah none of that matters since Moms for Liberty co-founder and Sarasota school board member Bridget Ziegler engaged in immoral, potentially illegal, and definitely gross sexual activity. The most disturbing part is that she was reading Charlotte’s Web at the time.
Bridget Ziegler told police that she and her husband Christian, Florida GOP chair, had a threesome with an unnamed woman a year ago and that it was consensual. Now the woman is suing Mr. Ziegler for sexual battery after an encounter in October. She said that she had only agreed to it if Bridget would be there but then Bridget didn’t show up. I haven’t been this confused since Riverdale.
Police sought a search warrant because Christian told them that he filmed the recent consensual encounter that was definitely not consensual. First he said he’d deleted the video but then admitted to putting it on Google Drive which, let’s face it, is the best place for it.
As you can imagine, critics are accusing Bridget of being a hypocrite and urging her to resign from the board. I don’t think she’s a hypocrite. I just think she’s one of those people who pretends to be something that they’re not.
Back to Grandparents for Truth, which would be an excellent band name if it weren’t already taken by The Rolling Stones. (Up top.)
The group, which is affiliated with the crazy liberal People for the American Way, launched in June to mobilize against conservative groups like Moms for Liberty and their outsized impact regarding school curriculum, censorship, bigotry, and sex for hire.
Grandparents for Truth are challenging the rationale behind book bans, which tend to single out communities of color, LGBTQ people, and anything that is historically accurate.
Now if you’re like me, when you think of old people you think of Wilford Brimley and Quaker Oats and Cocoon and Steve Guttenberg. But I’ve also started thinking of myself, which is horrifying. I mean, I’m not as old as Steve Guttenberg and I’m certainly not as old as Wilford Brimley since he’s dead.
I’ve felt senior for years, even back when my daughter was small and we were at Central Market playground and she made up a game where I was the grandma and she was my grandaughter so she ran around yelling GRANDMA at me. That was fun.
So instead of Grandparents for Truth, I could start up a group called Middle Aged Moms for Truthiness with a bunch of bored sexually deviant housewives with nothing better to do than spread false narratives and oh wait.
Already exists.