There’s been a lot going on this week, from the Georgia runoff to Trump’s legal woes to the school cocktail party I attended with other third grade parents. I’m not kidding when I say I’m the oldest mom there. Not like, oh, I’m one of the older moms but like the oldest. I try to keep this a secret by wearing inappropriate clothing and telling everyone that next year is my 15-year high school reunion. It’s going to be lit.
But that’s not what this is about. This post is about the ongoing and brutal campaign against…wait for it…Christianity. Don’t pretend you’re not a card-carrying member of the vast surveillance network that has infiltrated evangelical churches, Hobby Lobby stores and Amy Grant reunion tours nationwide.
This week the Supremes heard arguments in a lawsuit brought by Lorie Smith (no relation), a graphic designer in Colorado who doesn’t want to create websites for gay weddings based on her religious beliefs and her First Amendment right to free speech. (Spoiler: The justices are poised to rule in her favor since they have this thing about stripping away equal rights.) It’s important to point out that no gay couples have actually asked her to create a website for them but she thought she’d just lob a preemptive strike so she could get a free trip to Washington.
Although Smith claims to have accepted gay clients in the past, she does not want to be required to provide design work for same-sex weddings because that would involve actual creativity. After that bakery guy refused to make cakes for same-sex weddings, Colorado passed a state law prohibiting businesses that are open to the public from discriminating against gay people. There goes his idea for separate water fountains.
The name of Smith’s business is 303 Creative which is definitely not creative because 303 is just a Colorado area code. I know this because I used to live there, not because I have some maniacal obsession with memorizing every state’s area codes. That would be weird.
But I get it. I consider myself a creative even though no one else does. And I write exclusively for an Irish Catholic audience because Protestants go against my deeply held religious beliefs along with other breakaway sects such as Lutherans and Thetans.
However Smith is not the only one suffering from anti-Christian bias this week. Kirk Cameron/Mike Seaver/Crazed Evangelical is not being invited to read his new book at libraries across America. Doesn’t he already know about public libraries and their preference for peddling smut and books about butts instead of conservative family values?
His book, “As You Grow,” has apparently been rejected by over 50 public libraries. Some haven’t even responded. Dude. Have you never been to a public library? My library card has been on a temporary hold for months now because of some 80-year-old volunteer who thinks I still owe them 10 cents for The Hunger Games.
Apparently instead of giving those time slots to Cameron, they’re handing them out to drag queens and prostitutes. Honestly I don’t care who’s doing a book reading. I just want a free hour of childcare.
You know you love Amy Grant …
I bet Kirk Cameron still lives above the Seaver garage and these are just picture books made with finger paint.