Woman on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown
On shy female voters, cold calling & the Emerald Isle.
You know what I love? Sitting at a coffee shop and listening to the guy at the next table whistle along to Carole King, like he doesn’t actually know the words but still wants to have some minor role in “It’s Too Late.” Clearly the guy has no idea how close I am to losing it. It wouldn’t take much for me to reach across the table and kill him. There’s not a jury in the world that would convict me.
It feels like 2016 all over again. Except back then I was under the illusion that Hillary would win by a landslide because that’s what all the polls were saying and if you can’t trust random samplings of dishonest voters, what can you trust?
I’ve continued to receive campaign texts although I thought I’d unsubscribed to all of them. Over the past week I’ve gotten around eight messages from some woman who calls me Orenthia. “Hi Orenthia! How do you plan to vote in this election?” Orenthia? Apparently they think I live in Greece and could give a shit.
On Tuesday I volunteered for a phone bank for the Travis County Democrats (please, don’t call me a hero), meaning I made some calls while purposely ignoring the lame script. Most people who answered told me to take them off my list. One woman, when asked if we could count on her support, yelled HELL NO before hanging up. She probably just needs more time.
A middle-aged woman (I could tell by the sound of desperation in her voice) was very nice, telling me she always votes Democrat and that her adult daughter was taking her to vote the next morning and she’d really love to meet me for a light lunch so we could chat some more and I finally had to tell her to take me off her list.
So I don’t think I changed any minds although one caller told me I had a great voice, which I already knew. I suppose it was worth it as I had nothing better to do but carve pumpkins by myself.
Anyway we’ve heard a lot lately about how women can vote their conscience and no one has to know about it. Which I think is strange. Really? Women are afraid to tell people what they think? I can’t even imagine what it would be like to not share my opinions every chance I get. It’s why I’m never invited to happy hours or baptisms. It’s hard being the smartest person in the room.
There’s an ad campaign out voiced by Julia Roberts featuring a blond woman in a bedazzled flag baseball cap going into the voting booth while her Trumpy husband in an American eagle cap waits for her. She peeks over the booth and notices another woman. They share a conspiratorial smile and mark their ballots for Kamala. What rebels!
She walks out and her husband asks, “Did you make the right choice?” and she says, “Sure did, honey!” And then they go home so she can make his pot roast and darn his socks. Are we seriously at this point where women are hiding their votes from their husbands?
Yet again, people are talking about leaving the country if Trump gets elected. I’ve thought about it myself. But I was talking to a woman who said that people shouldn’t leave, they should stay here and fight. I nodded, as in, me too.
Then I immediately dialed the Irish consulate to try and get my Irish citizenship. I argued that my great-grandmother had come over from Ireland but they still sounded skeptical. I said they probably have a record of her. Try “Nana.”
Stay strong in these last few days. However if she loses Pennsylvania, you need to decide whether you’re a fighter or a runner. I figure I can still fight the good fight from Mutton Pub in County Cork over an aged Jameson whiskey.
Sláinte mhaith!
I’m not leaving, we Sisks are fighters and grabbers (stealers) whatever advantage we can. I’m still not going for a paid membership for you but it will feel nice Tuesday night as the numbers come in to know that both of us, you in Texas and me in California, are hoping that America wins and by that of course I mean Harris. Below is my pinned Facebook message until Election Although I post other things. The glory is in all of us.
This eagle sees it—the strength, speed, vision, power.
Because America is already the greatest country on earth.
Americans just need to pull back together and commemorate our mutual unstoppable strength.
Let’s all do that Tuesday. [I posted it with the really great photo of an eagle looking at itself in the ice]. Hey about this - are you subject to persuasion (bribe), I just sent you a Facebook friend request out of my sister’s FB, so if you accept me as a friend, I will be your paid subscriber. 😊
Ireland is going to get overrun with ex-pat American Democrats. Kath and I are talking about what we should pack. Kate McCaffrey might get in before me, seeing as her name is really Irish. I’ll be behind the wall the Van Morrison builds to keep me out. Pray to St Patrick for mercy. The Smith thing is not useful. Marichal even less so.