Spoiler Alert
On RFK, Jr., third-party candidates & Honey Fitz.
I remember following third-party candidate Ross Perot’s impact on the race between George H. W. Bush and Bill Clinton back in 1992. (OK, fine. I don’t really “remember” that because I was halfway through college and most likely “day drinking.”) Ross ultimately secured 19% of the popular vote meaning that he wasn’t like high-school-jock-popular but maybe friendly-nerd-popular.
Then there was 2000 featuring Ralph Nader and the Supremes. (Worst band name since Chumbawamba.) Gore lost Florida and George W. got elected and I thought the world would end. But then Trump happened and now I think W.’s one of the greatest presidents of all time.
Nader played a pivotal role in that election running as a Green Party candidate. His likely voters were self-described Democrats, Susan Sarandon, and that dude from The Shawshank Redemption. Do you see where I’m going here? BECAUSE I SEE WHERE I’M GOING HERE.
I think there’s a real chance, not a fake chance, that Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. could be a champion spoiler, forever altering the future of this country by siphoning votes away from Biden. If only we had a real wackadoo campaign adviser to make wayward Democrats think twice about supporting him.
Oh, look!
Meet Rita Palma, the campaign’s New York state director and spoiler wannabe. She has called Trump her favorite president on numerous occasions, although just doing it once is enough to prove you’re a looney toon. (Both “wackadoo” and “looney toon” are official psychiatriac terms listed in the DSM-IV, of which I have a signed copy.)
Aside from attending “Stop the Steal” rallies, Palma was also at the Capitol on January 6th, although she later responded that there was no riot and it was 99.9% peaceful. Kind of like a candlelight vigil except with weapons, zip ties, window smashing, looting, and calling for the hanging of the vice president.
Hey, if Rita wants to convince Trumpers that Kennedy’s their guy, more power to her. He’s a lot more Trump than Kennedy. And, as a self-appointed honorary Kennedy, I should know.
In fact, this is a perfect time to mention the Honey Fitz lamp, one of our most treasured family heirlooms. Honey Fitzgerald was Rose Kennedy’s father and JFK, Jr.’s grandfather. He was the Mayor of Boston and also served in Congress. He may have been corrupt but we don’t talk about that.
Most importantly, he attended my grandparents’ wedding. Perhaps you’re heard of them. Their names were Mom and Pop. Anyway Honey Fitz gave them a lamp for their wedding and that lamp is intended for me. It’s currently at my sister’s house in Virginia for “safekeeping” and probably “encased in glass.”
Hey, RFK, Jr. Come and Take It.
Also, when do you get the lamp? And that's really cool.
signed copy lol